My former best friend is dead and copies of his clones' bodies keep showing up in strange and interesting places. Today it was my wig closet, yesterday shoved in Emma and Julia's water feature out in the backyard.

...

My wife has ceased speaking to me for several weeks now, and even though I miss her, I find that I don't mind so very much. We ARE communicating by notes, which help because I am not capable of carrying on a normal marriage and family life after having been at sea so long.

...

My two favourite officers are either incapacitated or dealing with post Morgause trauma.

...

My youngest son refuses to attend school with Americans or David Noble, though for some strange reason, he adores the McManus brothers and wants to trick them into teaching him "The Best Way To Blow Up Lenora".

...

My second eldest son is deserting the Navy before he becomes a power hungry freak and has arranged a possible cushy appointment for himself within the army by becoming friends with a high ranking official. I will say this for Fleetwood, he has learned the value of nepotism if nothing else.

...

A French boy who is quite possibly homosexual has nonetheless an interest in my youngest daughter and is writing horrible poetry for her as we speak.

...

John Addison and Thomas Jones have now come back into my life.

...

May I climb out of the ride vehicle now?

-Ed. Pellew

There are several things to consider before making the leap from simply thinking of joining the Legion, to actually travelling to France and enlisting at a recruiting centre:

Appraise your physical condition. Activities in the Legion tax your physical endurance and abilities to the maximum. The most important physical requirement is running. You are advised to be able to run at least 10 kilometres with ease. Medical problems of any nature will almost surely disqualify you. Even seemingly minor issues such as poor eyesight can prevent you from being accepted. Recommended minimum physical prerequisites are:
- 30 pushups.
- 50 situps.
- Climb a 20 foot rope without using your feet.
- Run 8 kilometres with a 12 kilogram rucksack in less than one hour.
- 8 chinups with your palms away from you as you grip the bar.

The age range for joining is 18 to 40.

-Ed. Pellew

I have of this day, requested an active commission to begin as soon as humanly possible. We shall see whether or not the new fleet being sent out has a place for an Admiral this time around.

I can only hope that it does, I need to be away from all of you for a bit.

-Edward Pellew

I would, in fact hope that simply because a man is attempting to hide his own addictive behaviors and has become compulsive in that hiding that he would not needlessly accuse another of engaging in the same behavior he is failing to hide himself.

Thank You, Stephen Maturin for casting doubt upon my person in order to draw suspicion away from yourself. Thank you for seeking an easy place to hide and doing so. I most appreciate your honnesty and forthrightness in all matters concerning addictive substances as you well know and should you say something, well we know it is in fact the absolute truth because no man on earth knows more than you and no man ever shall.

Thank you for not only being dishonest yourself, but for doing it in order to make me look bad and in an attempt to ruin my name here. Come visit me later, we will have a celebratory glass of laudanum in honor of your acheivements.

Mr. Jefferson, I do appologize, yet your defense of a man who so does not deserve it and in fact deserves much worse than any mortal man could render onto him does puzzle me I must confess.

But to your own I suppose.

-Edward Pellew